Of Goals and Striving

I am a goal oriented person. I have to be careful because I can get hyper focused on a goal and in the process become not a great friend.

When I did 30 before 30 it was a vivid reminder that I have had the opportunity to do so much and I am so grateful for the opportunities I have had. I’ve achieved things that 12 year old me never would have dreamed. Those four sheets of paper represent the current four Huge Goals I have. The two on the right I know I can achieve given time and effort. Both feel big and scary? But I can work hard and achieve them.

The two on the left are different. I cannot work hard or save up my way into them. If there was  a way, I would have done it. But these aren’t strive until you get there goals. And that is frustrating as we have all had those things. But for me, what I have found is when I strive for those left two goals…I move farther away from the right two. While I try to catch what I cannot seem to figure out it sabotages me for the goals I know I can do.

I have decided to stop striving.

And because I am a visual person, I lit those two sheets of paper on fire. I will no longer try to create situations that will make those two goals come alive. Instead I will take a deep breath, step back, and if those are in God’s plans He’ll have to open the door and likely push me through it. I am going to focus my energy on pursuing those things that I know I am supposed to be pursuing and goodness knows, those are big enough on their own.